Mission QuiteNearly Impossible
by LauranTheBiscotti
Summary: After Stop In the Name of PANTS, you'd think Gee would have all the problems,but Jas is having some of her own...Tom is moving away ! Possibly forever! Jas/Tom fluff stuff with a bit of PANTS thrown in. Will have alternating Gee/Jas/Tom POV after chpt 4
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone, this is a public announcement and apology for posting SO much on ONE DAY.

I write,plan,etc everything out FIRST before I write the story, and then I write the story.

So...yeah,I have about 12 stories on my hard drive.

It's taking up 713KB and so I only have...5% more space on my 1.6 GB hard drive...and I did NOT want to destroy it so...er...yeah sorry again my stupid computer is a POS (well,it IS Windows!) and tries to crash,etc and I am terrified I'll lose EVERYTHING...again ~!

So ,once again,I am sorry for the MASSIVE overload of stories and so on.

**I do NOT own **** Georgia Nicolson,Masimo-Stupid-Scarlotti or Dave the Laugh, and so on...Louise Rennison does !**

**But the plot is my own :)**

**er,,,r?r?...maybe?**

**SORRY EVERYONE**

**IT WAS THIS OR...LOSE EVERYTHING !**


	2. Dave In His Full Glory

This takes place after Love Is A Many Trousered Thing, and the Campo Fiasco,as if it's the start of a new term (I live in the US and;therefore,am not sure how long a school year is and how they run).

**I do NOT own Georgia Nicolson,Masimo-Stupid-Scarlotti or Dave the Laugh, and so on...Louise Rennison does !**

**But the plot is my own :)**

**er,,,r?r?...maybe?**

**SORRY EVERYONE**

**IT WAS THIS OR...LOSE EVERYTHING !**

GEE POV

**CHAPTER 1:DAVE IN HIS FULL GLORY **

**Monday,September 19th**

**School,AKA Hell**

Back to school, and no one has noticed my confusednosity.

Typical.

**Physics**

At least Herr Kamyer has had a god Mum has knitted him a new sweater and matching socks and he's at least got a tan.

It's only on his nose, but still.

**15 Seconds Later**

I wonder how you can get a tan only on your nose and no where else ?

Sent Rosie a note asking the same.

Rosie wrote back "By wearing a baclava on the beach,duh."

**4p,Last Bell**

The first day back and in trouble already,bloody hell.

It's not like I did anything wrong.

We're being forced to learn about stars and galaxies and such crap,and Herr Kamyer was talking about the expansion of the universe, and when it accelerates stars will be exstinguished and all that will be left behind will be gas that can kill things light-years away,and I said "Like when my Dad eats a tin of beans and lights his farts." and I got into trouble.

Like I told Slim,I was just trying to find a similar comparison of the colllapsing of the universe and the end of life as we know it, so I could understand better and get top grades in Physics,but she called "vulgar" and "waste of desk space" and sentenced me to a week of Elvis Duties.

Slim said she was going to post a notice home to let M and V know, so I had thought "Oh, all I have to do is beat the postie home and burn the evidence" but then Slim said she was going to to call M and Vati ahead and let them know what has happened.

Evil, that so-called 'woman' is pure evil...

And lard.

**15 Seocnds Later**

Like Jas.

Minus the evil bit, and more twit-nessosity.

**10 Minutes Later **

I decided to take a short cut home through the park, so I could possibly get home before Mum and her lardy mate but I was cut off by a mad man in trainers.

"Hello, Kitty Kat, are you stalking me?"

"No Dave,I am on a mission."

"In a beret?"

I snatched the beret off and shoved it into my rucky.

"No,I have to get home before Mum and Dad do."

"Ah, suspension on the first day,hm?"

"it wasn't my fault !"

Dave raised an eyebrow.

"Really! I was an innocent bystander!" and I told him what I had said.

Dave threw back his head and laughed.

God, he's 's got a gorgey laugh, and a gorgey mouth, and a gorgey smile and gorgey teeth..phew,I have the Horn really really bad.

Dave smiled and said "What are you staring at?"

I could feel my face go beet root.

"It's OK,I know I'm have my permission to worship me."

Aroggant git. I shoved him off the pavement and started to run.

He caught up to me fast, though. We were running even, neck-to-neck.

Rather, kept looking over and leering at me .

So I shoved him into a bush and did a runner as fast as I could, hahahaha.

**5 Minutes Later**

Damn,he found me.

I ducked down behind Mr-Next-Door's car where I could see up and down the street, but Dave must have taken a side street or something, because he sneaked up behind me and said "Looking for me?"

I think I had a full-out nervy spaz. But Dave didn't fact,he just lay about laughing.

I stood up and as cooly as I could said "I have more important things to bye."

Dave stopped laughing and stood up too.

"Tatty bye Georgia.I'll come by later so you can stare at me in my full gorgey glory later." and went off whistling.

OOOOOh I hate him, the arrogant ful-of-himself git!

**5pm**

I was so upset I found myslf up in my room doing my homework.

I've barricaded myself in my room so when Mum and Dad come home and hear Slim's message, they won't be able to kill me.

**7pm**

I should have brought some food up ; I'm starving.

Undid my barrier and went downstairs.

Mum didn't even look up from the tv as I went through the livingroom. She just said "Get me some coffee,will you?"

As I got myself some poptarts and Mum's coffee the doorbell rang.

I ignored it though and went through and gave Mum her coffee.

"The doorbell to your home is ringing."

"So answer it."

Libby jumped up "I get it ! I get it !"

I'm going back to my room.

As soon as Dad gets home I'm dead,so I need to prepare my makeup for when my mangled body is featured on the 5 o'clock news so at least I don't look like a Loon.

**2 Minutes Later,Looking In The Mirror**

Hmmmm...I am going to need more foundation to de-emphasize my nose.

The camera does add on 5 pounds and if my nose gets any huger I will collapse under it's sheer weight.

Good thing I'll be dead by then.

Shut up,brain.

**7.10pm**

Knock on the bedroomdoor as I was curling my eyelashes.

I grabbed my brush and hid it behind my back and sat on my least now I'm armed.

"Entre-vous!"

The door opened and Dave came in in a trench coat.

Er...

"What are you doing here?"

"Well, I told you I'd be by later so you can stare at me in all my gorgey glory."

Oh god, if he's in the nuddy pants...

"Erm, Dave I don't think that's a good idea."

Then Dave dropped the trench coat.

I screamed and threw my brush at him, but when I looked round he was actually laughing at me .

He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt under the trench coat !

"Will you shut up that laughing?"

"You should have seen your face,hahahaha"

I threw my pillow at him."Not funny you cream-faced loon!"  
That set him off further into a mad laughing fit so I was forced to duff him over the head with my pillow untill he shut up.

"I told you I'd be here in my full glory, and here I is nude under their clothes."

"You're an arse."

He stepped towards me,all serious. "You think so?"

"Yes,A big horse's arse with a cherry on top."

He grinned. "You have the most eloquent way with words Georgia,have I ever told you that?"  
I said "Well, no,actually-" and then he snogged me.

In my room! Without any warning !

How dare he!

**1 Minute Later**

Blimey he's a fab snogger though.

**7:30pm**

After 10 more minutes of fabby snogging (I could see my clock on the bedside table) Dave stopped and said "Aren't you going to insult me,miss mad?"

"OK,you're a foul evil git with-" and then he snogged me again!

Looord, I could feel my legs go jelloid, and my stomach felt all wobbly,like when you drink too much water, but not sick, just wobbly like your insides are sloshing about.

I had to put my hands on his hips to hold myself took this the wrong (ish) way and ran his hands through my hair and stroked my neck with his fingers.

I felt like I was melting.

No,no bad melting,Masimo is my one and only...

I tried to say "No,Dave" mid-snog but it came out as "EuH,Dave-"

Still snogging and not msising a beat (!) Dave went "Mmm?"  
I tried to step back but Dave pulled me closer at the same time, and we fell over,Dave on top, on my bed.

Dave raised his head."Hmm,you're keen!"

I opened my mouth to call him an arse again, but he snogged me,nibbling my lips.

We went on like that for about 15 he sort of rolled to his side untill I was on top of him,still snogging.

He ran his hands down my back, then to my waist, then ,he puts his hands up my shirt!

Ohmygiddygodstrousers ! Number 8!

I could hadly believe it was MY nunga-nungas being fondled !  
I am offically a fondleree (the verb is to fondle: I fondle, he/she/it fondles..etc).

It felt fabbity fab but a little voice in my head said "What about Masimo?"

I reached up and moved Dave's hands down to my waist but he whispered "Bad kitty" and started kissing down my neck, his hands still in my bra.

And that's the postion we were in when Jas,Tom,Rosie,Sven,Dom,Rollo and Jools banged into my room.


	3. Grounded Untill Menopause

I don't own Georgia Nicolson nor any of her mates or mad cats,those are all Lousie Rennison's's's.

**CHAPTER 2: GROUNDED UNTILL MENOPAUSE**

**Monday,Spetember 19th (Still)**

**8p**

I sat up fast,knocking Dave to the floor and said as naturally as I could "What's going on?"

They all stared at me though untill I looked down and realized my shirt was tucked into my bra.

I pulled it out hastily and said "I was changing, don't you lot know how to knock?"

"And that's why Dave was halfway up your shirt?"

"No,I -er,I fell."

They just raised their eyebrows at me.

I turned round and said "Right Dave?" but got no answer.

That's when I realized I didn't see Dave.

I crawled to the edge and looked over.

He was laying on the floor,staring at the he saw me look over he smiled and said "I like it when you're fiesty."

I threw my pilow at him but he caught it and stood up.

"Well, it's getting late and we're having an early supper.S'laters." and he kissed me on the cheek and went out.

The Ace Gang stared at me,agog.

I looked at them. "Shut up." and went out.

**20 Seconds Later**

They're still looking at me.

Like I'm a looking-at thing...

**2 Minutes Later**

Went downstairs to avoid the stares.

Mum and Dad were canoodling on the .

"Mum, have you seen my rucky?"

Mum turned half way around on the couch,no easy feet sitting next to Dad, and said "It's in the kitchen, and by the way,you're grounded untill you hit menopause so you're little friends need to go ." and she turned back round.

I grabbed my rucksack and went back upstairs.

As I went into my room, Jas was saying "-hurting her feelings."

I threw down my bag and sat on the bed "Mum says I'm grounded untill menopause, so you lot need to go home,NOW."

They looked at each other then got up to leave. Rosie said "Ok,but we just came over to tell you Robbie dumped Lindsay."

WHAT?

**Bed**

Turns out Robbie found out through one of the guys from his old band that Lindsay was being nice to trap him, and what a horrible wet weed she really is and dumped her in front of everyone at Costa Rico's.

And then left her with the bill.

So every cloud has a silver lining.

We did a victory sailor's hornpipe dance on the bed til Vati came up and shouted at them to Go Away.

But I don't care -I am soooooo happy !

Lindsay had her Robbie eclair and ate it too, but then choked on it ,hahahaha.

**Midnight**

Mind,this does mean I'll have to be on super-duper guard at school,now.

Now that Lindsay's life is ruined, she'll set out to ruin mine.

Criminey.

**Tuesday,September 20th**

8am

Forced to go back to school on the grounds I apologize to Herr Kamyer in front of the whole Lord.I'd rather have the plague!

I told Mum that and she actually shrugged and said "You should have thought of that".

Thought of what?

Met Jas at her gate.

"I thought you were out for today too."

"I was but Mum and her portly partner talked to Hawkeye, and she's agreed to let me back in if I publicly apologize to Herr Kamyer in front of the WHOLE school."

"Including the first formers?"  
"Yes,Jas,even in front of them."

I had a horrible thought. "What if this is karma, for me being glad Robbie dumped ?"

"How would that be karma?"

"I was glad she was pubically humiliated and now I have to be publically humiliated."

Jas thought for a bit."But you got sent home before that happened."

I said as patiently as I could "Yes, Jas, but Mum talked to Hawkeye that night."

"oh."

"oh, that's all you can say?"

"Oh, wow?"

I shoved her off the stumbled and fell into a thorn bush.

Seeing her pull stickers out of her bum did raise my spirits a bit, but not much,especially when she insisted I help her as it's my fault she was in the bush in the first place, and then as I was pulling a particularly long thorn out of her bottom Masimo just happened to drive by.

I straightened up and waved, hoping that he would stop, but he just drove on.

Jas said "Maybe he didn't see you."

I shoved her back in the bush and ran into school.

**Loos**

Oh God, I know Masimo saw me because he looked directly at me as he drove by.

He saw me pulling thorns out of Jas ginormous bottom and now he probably thinks I am a lesbian.

great.

**10 Minutes Later**

I must have dozed offf becase the next thing I knew was a crowd of titches came into the loos,talking and laughing.

It's no suprise I woke up-they're talking really I think some of them are even playing tig.

They were shouting and yelling 'Gotcha!".

I started to get up to tell them to shut up and go away, but sat down again when one of the titches,it must have been the ginger one that lobes Dave,said "So did you see Lindsay's hair in Assembly?"

"I didn't know she dyed her hair."

"No stupid, it's her real other was extensions."

"She looks a bit like peter pan with that haircut."

"Or a Beatle."

"I heard she got dumped in Costa's."

"Yeah, that gorgey singer dumped her and then left her there to pay for their coffees!"

The tiches all laughed.

"So who do you think he meant, by the other girl?"  
"You mean Lindsay's a lezzie?"

There was a thump, like someone being kicked."No,Robbie said something about being fake, unlike another girl who's not afraid to be her mad self."

"oooh,I bet it's that 6th-year, the one with a beard."

"OOOER" and then there was another sound like a kick.

I wanted to go out and ask them exactly what Robbie had said but the bell went and they all went out .

After they'd gone I slipped out to the mirrors.

My eyes are all red and puffy, like I've ben crying and my hair is standing on end.I look like a mad person.

No wonder Masimo and Robbie and Dave all dumped me.I'm ugly and need to go to an ugly home.

**10 Seconds Later**

Well,technically Dave dumped me because I was using him as a red herring, but still.

**45 Minutes Later**

Wet my hair and washed my face,then applied a bit of natural makeup to hide the blotches and for a bit of a pick-up, then snuck upstairs to the usual break-place,being careful not to spotted as A)I have no makeup on, and 2)I don't want to be seen by the Nazi Youth Patrol. I heard someone let the rats the lower forms disect loose.

Hawkeye is probably going to blame it on me somehow, but if I wasn't at school today,she can't say I did it.

At any rate,I made it to the heaters without Ace Gang were very suprised to see nearly choked n a midget jem.

Rosie put it best,though, saying "Where in the Hell you've been?"

I told them about apologizing to Herr Kamyer and the titches in the loo.

"So,what do you think they meant,the other girl?"

"He did cheat on you before."

"Well, actually, he was technically dating Lindsay but secretly dating me at the same it wasn't cheating it was just.."

Jas said "Swapping."

We all looked at her. "ERGH!"

"Well, he went out with Lindsay,then snogged you,it would be like you kissing-"

I snatched her midget gems away. "If you finish that sentence,Jasmine Keller,I swear your midget gems will get it."

She actually spazzed and made a sort of motion like she was grabbing the gems from me, like the time I held the Bummer Twin's fags ovr the toilet,threatening to flush made the same motion.

I only gave the midget gems back to her after she promised to never finish that sentence,ever.

But as the bell went and they slouched off back to class she said in a small voice "I was just saying.." and I had to duff her up.

But only just ; Slim jelloided around the corner like a slug in PANTS and I had to make a break for the first floor.

**Lunchtime**

Still in the loos.

I'drather stick my head in a bag of whelks then publically apologize to Herr Kamyer like a teachers' botty kisser.

It is sooooo boring doing nothing.

No wonder lonley people commit suicide...there's nothing else to do!

**15 Minutes Later**

I guess I could do my hair,makeup,etc to prepare for the walk home,just in case Masimo pops up (oo-er).

**37 Minutes Later**

Done.

Now what?

I checked my watch.

Hmmmm... R.E. is next period and I desperately need to talk to the Ace Gang about the whole Dave-or-Masimo situation.

I don't even know how I started snogging just ...sort of every other time we've snogged...

**15 Minutes Later,R.E.**

At the bell, while everyone was milling about,crept up the stairs and into R. one ever knows what's going on in that class, so I won't be noticed.

I sat down behind Jas. She didn't even notice me untill I reached up and tapped her shoulder.

She had a nervy spaz and knocked her makeup onto the .

""What are you doing here?"

"I was bored.I've spent all day in the loos and I need someone to talk to."

"Well, talk to Ellen or Jools.I have a date with Tom and I have to get ready."

"You mean a nature ramble."

"No a date."

"A real one,no veggies except Tom involved?"

"Yes, Gee,and I have to get ready!" and she got up to pick her makeup I guess she had a skirt on or that the rest of us were behind her, because she bent down,exposing her ginormous knickers to the world.

Rosie yelled 'Oooh nice panties!"" and wolf-whistled.

Jas jumped up like a red-faced loon (which she is),gathered her makeup and stalked off, giving us the evils which set us off laughing harder.

**Home**

Sang We Are The Champions walking day.

I don't even miss Jas.

**6pm**

Eating a lovely dinner of,er,nothing when Jas rang.

I had barricaded myself in my room to eat as Dad has some of the 'Lads' over to watch footie and fart,and Mum had me watch Libby as she's at the movies with her aerobics instructor,'Hans', so it took me ages to get out,but I picked up on the last ring.

"Hello?"

"Gee,can I come round?"  
"Why? Are you going to yell at me again?"

"No."

"Then why do you want to come over?"

There as a pause then Jas said in a small voice "Tom wants to break up."

"Come over immediately.I'll make some of my special coffee."

"K." and she put the phone down.

Went downstairs to make my special coffee with poptarts for nutritional value.

Dad followed me into the kitchen "Are your silly little mates coming over?"

"Are your silly lardy mates ever going to leave?"

He tutted and went out with a bowl of crisps.

He's turning out to be worse than Mum.

In the tutting department,I mean.

**6:15pm**

Jas came over just as I finished the coffee and we grabbed our snacks and scurried up to my room.

Jas sat on my bed while I divided the coffee.

"So what happened?"  
"Well;, Tom came round and we went to the movies, then Costa's for I should have known something was going on because he wasn't talking, and he usually is talkative, you know?"

No. "Yeah,uh-huh."

"Well, after the movie we went to Costa's and thenh home, and when he got to my door, he didn't even snog just said 'I'm leaving to uni soon and I think it's best we broke up for now.' and that was it." And she started crying. Good Lord.

Boys can be SO stupid !

**7:30**

Jas has gone home.

She cried for a long time, then she went for ages on and on about hr 'feelings' and 'being meant for each other' God on and ON...

It was enough to drive me bonkers.

She says that since Tom is going away,he doesn't see a point for them to be together.I told her "Even though Masimo lives in London, we're still dating."

And she sniffed and said "Yeah,and look how good that is going." so I had to duff her her up, and of course she left in her Huffmobile.'

Again.

**8p**

Jas rang." Tom is going away to uni in Australia for a while for some nature studies thing, and won't be back untill Christmas Hols.I am going to kill myself out of sheer lonliness."

I told her "You'vre come to the right Masimo is off in London, I try to better myself. You know, to show him how much I've grown while he's been gone."

"What,you mean stretch myself? That doesn't really work,you know."

"No you ninny, I mean dye your hair or grow out your nails, do something to show that you haven't missed him a bit."

"But I already do miss him!" and she started crying again so I had to put the phone down on her.

Honestly, this boy business is a nightmare.

I'd be better of dead.

**10 Minutes Later**

Or a lesbian.


	4. Crusty Uranus

I don't own any of the stories or the GeorgiaNicolson Diaries characters...Louise Rennison does.

**crusty uranus**

**Wednesday,Spetember 21st**

**8am**

Back to school.

I feel hot and cold at the same time.

I think I'm getting the flu...

**2 Minutes Later**

I asked Mum to take my temperature cause I thought I had or was getting the flu but she told me I was being ridiculous.

**5 Minutes Later**

I just remembered when Libby was playing nurse she borrowed the thermometer to take Angus' I don't mean orally.

Erghh.

**9am**

Met up with the Ace Gang in Assembly.

I was going to sit next to Rosie.I'd rather sit with her and be exposed to her loonosity than have to talk to Jas about her 'feelings',but Jas wasn't there so I sat in my usual spot.

Then Slim came out in a wool pantsuit and addressed us. "Due to the untimely release of school science lab property,Langley and Mortimer will not be holding classes starting tomorrow lasting throughout the weekend."

All the classes went crazy, cheering "Hip hip hooray for Slim and her merry band of lesbians!" for the longest time .Hawkeye had to shout at us as loud as she could before we were quiet.

"Now, as I was saying, due to the untimely release of school science lab property,Langley and Mortimer will not be holding classes starting tomorrow lasting throughout the weekend,re-opening on Monday so there is to be no exucse for homework undone, tardiness, or school will be covered and sprayed by exterminators,using I'm sure, a noxious spray, so everyone at the end of classes, needs to bring all food items and containers out and take them home with you bringing what they need back on that to be understood? Now, stand for the opening prayer."

We were too exicted to pray though, and all throughout the gym you could hear the buzz of groups of girls talking.

Jools said "I bet it was the ginger titches, the ones that call you want to be just like you, stupid gits." I hit her round her ear with my beret.

Ellen said "But, er, won't they like, I mean, the rats..and the chemicals..."

"Yes, but that's the titches didn't think this sort of thing they had done it at the last bell Friday,they could have all escaped out by Monday."

"Like when you let the locusts out?"

"I still maintain it was an accident." and they all sid "Sure,uhuh."

**Physics.**

We're supposed to be studying the outermost layers of the terrestial planets but we've all too besides, the whole class has got the mad know the type, when one person laughs, the person next to them starts giggling, then the girl next to them starts giggling, and then so on and it spreads so that everyone has it? Well we had that.

Herr Kamyer is going over a review of the terrestial planets,focusing today on Uranus, but he keeps pronouncing it "Your Anus.".

So when ever he says something like "Uranus is covered with a thick crust" we start off in mad giggling.

But we're not helping matters when Rosie raised her hand and asked "Herr Kamyer, does Uranus have gaseous rings around it?",pronouncing it like Herr Kamyer does, and Herr Kamyer, looking taken aback, replied, "Ja, but off course it does." and looked even more confused when we laughed like mad.

So no one really is paying much attention to the class.

But Herr Kamyer hasn't even noticed. All we've got to do is raise our hand every few minutes and ask about Uranus and Herr Kamyer won't let on .

I don't think he ever will.

The Ace Gang,sans Jas are allowed to sit together this term so we got a chance to chat during the madness that is called Physics.

Jools asked "So does anyone know where Jas is?"

"Maybe she's on her period." Rosie asked.

"No, remember, she ate your whole choccy bar last week?"

Rosie frowned. 'Oh,right."

"I know where she is.." and they looked at me. "Well,at least I think I do." and I told them about Tom and Australia.

Jools swore quite violently and Rosie was even gobsmacked for a minute.

"Maybe I can have Sven go over and knock some sense into him."

"If he gets jailed he'll be sent back to Reindeer-a-go-go Land."

"Right, I don't want that. What should we do then?"

"Maybe she should,like, I mean...it IS far away and..." Ellen trailed off at our Look.

"We need to convince her she's a catch with or without Tom around."

Rosie snort-laughed and said "That's funny,Ge.."

"No,I mean it, we've got to show her that it's sad and useless to throw your self at a guy."

"Like when you stalked Robbie?"

"Shut up. Jools."

"And Masimo."

"Shut up Mabs. This is different." They raised their eyebrows in tandem like short furry synchronized swimmers..or something.

Anyways,they raised their eyebrows in tandem and I said "She's crying because he's going off to be gone for 6 months. Robbie was gone for 2 whole years."

Jools rolled her eyes "Oh, that'sREALLY different."

"COMPLETELY different!"

In the end, they agreed to help me convince Jas she really is a nice,useful person without Tom,aka Mission Impossible.

**R.E.**

My idea was to give Jas a makeover,makeup-wise AND clothes-wise,and start her on a low-midget-gem diet plan so she'll be stylish and thin(er) by the time Tom comes back for Chrimbo hols,and sees what he's missing and begs to stay home .So he'll be happy and Jas won't be so mopey and dull.

_Tres_ brilliant I think .

"Now, how are we going to convince her my plan is the bees knees?"

"Bribe her?" Rosie asked.  
"With what?"

"Midget gems."

"No, because she's supposed to be on a midget gem diet,remember?"

"Oh."

"Maybe if we like,I mean,tell her...she'll like, be happy and er, you know."

"Jas won't be happy if she finds out what we're doing."

"Too if you tell her she won a makeover? And get money from her Olds for it?I'm sure they'd be glad to have a new daughter."

I gave Jools a big hug."Brilliant! So it's settled, we're to meet at Jas' after school round 5?"

They did synchromized nodding like those little bobble head dogs people put in thier veee-hicles in New York,New York and then a bit of Horn dancing.

**15 Minutes Later**

Miss Wilson thought we were nodding because we agreed that the old,old time-y astronomer blokes were all heretics and her bob nearly exploded in excitement.

How sad.

Never mind.


	5. I Grabbed Rosies Beard ooer

I don't claim to own anything...Louise Rennison does!

**Please R&R !**

**MISSION IMPOSSIBLE**

**Wednesday,Spetember 21st**

**5p,In Front of Jas'**

The Gang had to all run home,grab their makeup kits and magazines and then run back up the hill to Jas',so naturally we're standing here gasping for breath like loons in heat.

For some reason Rosie was wearing all black, and had a beard that nearly touched the ground.

'So what's the plan,batwoman?"

"I'll go in first, sans makeup, and say I'm there to give her her homework, being the swot she is."

"But don't say swot, she's a vair sensative swot."

"Right. I'll be in there 5 minutes, then Jools will pop in to check up on her, and then 5 minutes later Rosie just happens to show up,and so on."

"Like when you stalked Tom to make him think she was fairly popular?"

"Exactomundo my hairy little pal."

I looked round. "Right, who has a watch?"

**30 Seconds Later**

Hm,no one has a all thought someone else was wearing one to school.

Dilemma,dilemma...

**45 Seconds Even Further**

Honor spoke up and said "Why don't you keep an eye on Jas' bedside clock, and signal out the window when the time comes?"

"What type of signal?" Jools asked.

Honor turned red and sid nothing.

Rosie saved her the trouble by saying "I know! She can take my beard in, and when 5 minutes pass, she can wave it out the window!"

"And how am I going to explain that to Jas?Oh, I'm feeling a bit of pique so I'm going to whip my beard out"

Rosie went "Ooer" and I had to duff her in the head with my makeup bag before going on "-and feel like waving it round out the window for the world to see!" Oh,yeah,Jas won't suspect a THING."

"Not if I don't go in first!"

She's got a point...

**5.05p,Crouching Behind Jas' Gate**

Right, stage two of Mission Quite-Nearly Impossible: Inlfilwhatsit!

Rosie yodeled to the door, and I mean yodeled, then knocked twice .

After a bit Jas' mum answered and she let Rosie in.

I looked at the Gang "This is it, gird your loins, we're going in !"

**ROSIE'S POV**

**20 Seconds Later-er.**

I'm in !

I gave Gee and Co thumbies uppsies as I went in.

Jas' mum was very , 's a bit weird.

She said "Jas is in her room,dear" then went off.

Huh. !

Tiptoed up the stairs.

**5 Seconds Later**

Hold on,why am I tiptoing?

I am a loud,proud Viking Queen-to be!

And ,as everyone knows us Vikings are NOT a quiet lot!

Whipped out my mararcas and horns and stormed up the stairs,shouting that well-known Viking battle cry.

And for you very,very dim out there,I mean "Hoooooorn!"

**10 Seconds Later**

Well, that didn't take very long. She poked her owly head out her bedroom door.

"What in the-oh, it's you." and she made to slam the door but I stuck my foot in.

"Ow,,buggery ow!"

Jas huffed "You shouldn't have stuck your big foot in there,Rosie" but she let me in.I collapsed on her bed after shoving a few owls owls too (hee hee).

I said "So what is up,mon pally?"

"Noffink."

I looked at her and she sighed "Well,I suppose Georgia is going to find out is leaving to check out unis in the States and he wants to break up for see if we are really meant to be, and I suppose it's sweet and all,but -" Good Lord Viking ,she can go on.

I interuppted her fringey weeling and jumped up on her bed."Let's have a groove-a-thon!"

"No, and what's more"

I looked at her hopefully.

"No."

I grabbed her hands and pulled her up with me onto her let out a little scream but that's only because she has not had any good fun in ages.

She has,as my hairy little pally says,been dating a vegetable!

"Let's grooove, vikette!"

And I tore my beard off and out the window.

**Gee's POV**

**The Longest 10 Minutes Ever, Later**

There's the signal!

I heard Jas scream, then a few seconds later Rosie's beard flew out (oo-er!).

I grabbed Rosie's beard (LEAVE it!) and put in on.

I looked at the Ace Gang "We're going in."

Ellen said "I though-like..one and...er"

"Yes, but that is taking too long and tide waits for no man!"

We went in and thundered up the I mean thundered.

We slammed into her room and she was standing on the bed,scrceaming as Rosie bouncecd her around like an,er...bouncing vole.

From Bouncilvanyia.

At any rate, we all climbed up on the bed to join the party !

**30 Minutes Later**

**TOM'S POV**

**30 Minutes Later**

I have dumped Po and already I miss everything that is her...her eyes,her smile...*sigh*

Maybe I should ring her...

**1 Minute Later**

Went down and Robbie was on the was saying "And she got mad?Well,you can't really blame her.."

Then he turned and saw me and held up his hand then said "Well,I've to go,meet you at the park?Uhhuh,ok,yeah." and he rang off.

He grinned at me "Wait till you talk to Jas." and walked out.

Huh.I wonder what that was all about?

**10 Seconds Later**

Rang Po and she was actually crying on the phone.

Oh,dear.

I was afraid to ask, but,being as I love her as much as I do,I had to.I was afraid Gee was involved.

I was right.

For the longest time she could only gulp and sob but eventually I got it out of her that she wasn't feeling well so bunked off school. And somehow,Gee and Co. got it through their heads that she was depressed then went round to Jas' to cheer her up.

So they went and visited her.

"But,that's good innit?"

"Yes,untill they all jumped on my bed and we all fell through the floor."

Oh,dear.

I promised her I'd come round later.

Was that a bad idea,I mean,after breaking up with her and all?

Hmmmm...I wish there was someone normal I could talk to..

**10 Minutes Later**

Couldn't think of anyone.

Rang Dave instead

"Hellooooooooooooo,you have reached the Hill residence, home of the original Sex Meister, the Sex Meister himself speaking !"

"Dave, I'm guessing you've spoken to Georgia?"

He started laughing.

He has,then.

"So you have then?"

He didn't say anything -just laughing.

"Dave?"

He kept on though and eventualIy I just gave up and set down the reciever on him.

**DAVE'S POV**

**10 Minutes Later**

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm,Hunky has hung up on me...

Oh well, it was bloody funny.

Gee says Jas' fringe was standing literally on edge.

I'd like to see that.

Of course,I'd like to see more of Gee.

**5 Seconds Later**

How freaky, I could just hear her voice in my head go 'Ooer'.

That settles it.I am going mad.

Jack the Biscuit needs to walk,breath the fresh air,etc.

**12 Minutes Later,The Park**

I remember when we first when she was using me as a Red Herring to get Robbie back.

She looked so innocent then,and I had to kiss her, and now-

OH MY GOD, WHY IS SHE SNOGGING HIM?


End file.
